Last updated: September 22, 2009

Translation by: Adrienne Weber
Edited by: Aiichi

Issue Release: April 2009
Original Japanese text property of Arena 37C magazine

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On Feb 16, miyavi announced on his home page that he would be leaving the PS Company. With his April 5th Hibiya Yagai Ongakudo show as a turning point, he chose to walk a new path. We asked him about his current feelings. The interviewer is one who has worked with miyavi since his days in Dué le Quartz and his first appearance in Arena 37C, and will give a special interview touching on miyavi’s life. We hope the Komiyavi will continue to walk with him, even down this new path.

I’m not going anywhere. I can promise you that.

It was the evening of February 16th. At my house, I received a fax that miyavi will be leaving the PS Company following his April 5th ‘NEO TOKYO SAMURAI BLACK -zoku nariagari 2009′ show at Hibiya Yagai Ongakudo. The fax was signed by Tomomi Ozaki, the president of PS Company, who has walked the past 10 years with miyavi. I felt shocked at the sudden turn of events, but nothing about the note felt negative. I could tell immediately the decision had been a positive one for both miyavi and President Ozaki.

When I met miyavi and President Ozaki, miyavi was still in the band Dué le Quartz. It was ten years ago. My first meeting with them was at a two story live house called Y2K in Roppongi. The ceilings were so low you had to duck so as not to hit your head. Dué le Quartz had less than ten people working with them. President Ozaki had just started the PS Company. She said to me, “This is one of the bands I’ll be working with. I hope you like them.”

It’s been ten years. Looking back, it feels like a long time.

After that, I saw miyavi for an interview almost every month. I’ve worked with many artists, and I don’t think anyone has changed as much as miyavi. He always surprises me. Dying his hair like a parrots, playing soccer in Tokyo Dome, shaving the sides of his head, jamming with traditional Japanese drums, playing his gigpig, going off to study in the US…

He’s always doing things like that so while I’m shocked at first, I get it; I think “That’s so like miyavi!” Part of me is completely sucked into his unique way of doing things. I’m sure the Komiyavi know the feeling I’m talking about.

Before Dué le Quartz broke up, I received a note like this, prior to the interview. It said:

“Don’t cry. Dué le Quartz is breaking up, but let’s say good bye with smiles on our faces. Because this isn’t a real good bye.”

Those words really left an impression on me. It’s been 6 years and 5 months since he became a solo artist. Who would have thought that after all this time, he’d make such a huge decision?

But this decision is really “so like miyavi.” To borrow miyavi’s own words, “That’s all it is.” Who he is won’t change. It’s just that his surroundings will change a little. That’s all.

But the decision to graduate from the place he’d been for 10 years can’t have been so simple to be explained by “That’s all it is.”

***

This interview was held three days after I received the fax. The editorial staff printed out some posts from Komiyavi’s blogs and brought them to the interview. miyavi was silent as he read them. He was so into his Komiyavi’s posts that I hesitated to talk to him.

“This makes me really happy…” miyavi murmured, and then he continued, “Can I keep these? I made this decision because I love all my fans, my Komiyavi. So I want to talk about it without hiding anything. But at this point I’m still a PS Company artist, and I want to respect that. I want to talk about it all when I’m able to do so. So today, I’ll talk about how I’m feeling right now.”

miyavi finished speaking, and placed the Komiyavi’s blogs carefully back on the desk.

How did reading that make you feel?

Really, really happy.

Some kids quoted the lyrics from “Itoshii Hito.” The Komiyavi are repeating to themselves the words that you’ve written and sung to them.

My thoughts are really getting across to them, aren’t they?

(Arena 37C Chief Editor Watanabe suddenly comes in the room)

Watanabe: Good work, miyavi! Man, this studio is really far! (LOL) I just wanted to come and say hi, but it’s really far away! Oh man. (LOL) Okay, so we’ll talk more another time! Do your best!

Huh? You’re leaving already!? You really did just come to say hi. (LOL) Thank you so much for taking the time; I know how busy you are! (He shakes Watanabe’s hand and then gives him a big hug.)

And he’s gone as quickly as he appeared. I think the boss was worried about you. Now that’s love.

It really is. He came all the way to Narita to see me off when I went to the US, and when I came back, he gave me the cover and let me ramble on forever. Arena 37C has really become a bridge between me and my fans. It’s really special. Thank you.

He (the Chief Editor) actually called me late last night. He talked to me for three hours about how reading the Komiyavi’s diaries made him cry.

For three hours!? That’s kind of a nuisance. (LOL)

It’s just proof of how many people love you, miyavi. (LOL) BY the way, I wanted to ask you about your decision…

I think it all started on my birthday last year. September 14th is always my day of reckoning every year. I think about all kinds of things. The company was coming up on its 10th anniversary, and I thought about how I wanted to be, and how far ahead I’ve come, and I decided I wanted to be more honest, I wanted to put everything out there, not just the good things, but the hard things and the painful things, too. I wanted to take all of that on together with everyone. I felt really strongly about that. Maybe the Komiyavi don’t want me to go that far, but I’m just a person like everyone else and I want to keep singing about my life.

And you couldn’t do that if you stayed with the company?

Maybe I could have, but for me, I want to go deeper, put all my cards on the table. And to be honest, there was a difference of opinion between me and the company, as far as that was concerned. I’ll talk about the details when the time comes, but I think that the company’s way of thinking is also very right. If I were in President Ozaki’s position, I probably would have said the same thing. I don’t think that the President’s way of thinking or the way the company does things is wrong. Maybe it’s even the better way.

I think it’s just that…after a lot of twists and turns…I just changed too much. That’s all.

I’m an artist who wants to sing songs about my own life; I think that’s the difference. I want everyone to understand that this was a decision that I made, not looking at the next one or two years, but that I made in order to still be singing as miyavi in ten or twenty years. And, of course, I’m not breaking with the company. I want you all to understand that this isn’t something negative. I think the president worried about it more than I did. But she understood it, and she supported me. I’m so grateful for the 10 years I’ve spent as part of the PSC family. And I’m really thankful to Saito who’s been my manager for ten years. All I can really say is thank you. I’m graduating, but I want to get even bigger and pay everyone back for it all.

If the show in January had been a mess, I don’t think I could have said it. Everyone really went wild over the event, and all the younger bands put on a really cool show, and I don’t mean this in a stuck up way or anything, but I really thought that PS Company will be alright. We’ll both go our own way and become bigger, and I’d love to do something huge together some day. Because my quitting the company can’t break the bonds we have. So I think it would be amazing if instead of staying in the same place and have a loose relationship, we can walk together as something that stimulates each other.

You’re just as awkward as ever, miyavi.

I really think I am awkward. Sometimes I wish I could live my life more smoothly, but I think if I could do that, I wouldn’t be singing. This is the only way I know how to live. And I know that a thorny path awaits me. But I felt like if I let this moment slip by, I’d never have another chance.

I really get that. I switched jobs at 27 because I thought this was the time to make that kind of decision.

Yeah. I thought, “Now’s the time.” I‘ve met a lot people who’ve been musicians far longer than I have. And saw a lot of ways of living your life, and I found my own way of living. I want to live in a way that I can turn my life into songs.

Do you know what comes next?

To tell the truth I’ve got no plan. Because I didn’t think it was right to have a plan before I quit. The world is made up of human relationships, so I wanted to do right by them. I haven’t decided what will happen next. I’m going to be starting at zero, because I think that’s only polite.

That’s true. I’m going to read a few of the Komiyavi’s blogs. “I’m sad that you’re leaving PSC, but I’ll always be a fan of miyavi and of PSC. I look up to you so much because you’ve always kept your eyes on yourself and us, fans, even if it worried you or hurt you. I respect the way you live your life from the bottom of my heart.”

I’m so happy. That’s why I want to be honest. If I don’t, then everything I’ve sang or said until now will become a lie.

They seem really worried about the Komiyavi Rengou (the fan club) dissolving.

It will dissolve temporarily because we need to start it up again because of some business matters. But don’t worry. I’ll make the fan club again as soon as the situation has been settled.

That’s a relief. Here’s one that’ll make you cry. “And I finally became a Komiyavi…I, at least, want a member’s card or something, I just want proof that I was a Komiyavi. It was my dream, and now this happens? I love miyavi, but…I’m sorry. I’m still confused, and I can’t really write it out well. Lastly, I love miyavi.”

I’m really, really sorry. But it will be okay. If you keep your member card, when we have the Komiyavi Rengou up and running again I’ll find a way to honor those. (LOL)

Hahaha. Please do that for them! Here’s another, “I’m sad you’re graduating. I’m sad the fan club’s dissolving. But, I guess, I’ll just come with you. I don’t care if you’re independent or with another company or anything as long as you keep releasing music. Even if you’re in another country, no matter where you are. I just want you to be yourself, miyavi.” And one said, “What if miyavi came back as a Kabuki actor??”

It’s way too late for me to do that. (LOL)

Well, you do always surprise us. So we’re used to it.

That’s true. (LOL) But everyone was really watching my back, weren’t they?

But this one says, “I’m not going to be a child Komiyavi anymore, I’m going to be a woman Komiyavi, okay!?”

She’s going to graduate and become a wonderful woman Komiyavi? (LOL)

Right. Some Komiyavi wrote, “If miyavi’s going to be walking down a thorny path, we want to walk in front of him and rip those thorns out for him.” And I think the thing they’re most worried about is that you’re going to go to the US.

I thought about it, but…I’ve got a long life ahead of me, and I think it’s a little too soon for that.

You let the Komiyavi know by direct e-mail on February 14th, right?

Right. February 14th has been a kind of anniversary every since Dué le Quartz. But apparently it took a while to get them out so people didn’t get the e-mails until the 16th. I was worried about how everyone would respond, so I was looking at the blog and my e-mail from the 14th on, but there were only things like “Good work today! Do your best tomorrow too!” like always and I was like, “Wow, everyone’s treating this very lightly…” (LOL)

That’s so funny. Did it take you a long time to write the e-mail or the note on your home page?

It did, because I kept thinking about what everyone would think and how they would take it. Every word I wrote true, so that was easy, but it did take a while to write. So I wrote it all out as well as I could. But I cried. I wasn’t sad, or happy, I just cried. I cried a lot.

Ten years is a long time.

It really is.

I think that the words of the Komiyavi are proof of how hard you’ve worked for these ten years.

I’m so sorry for worrying all of you. But I’m not going anywhere. I can promise you that. So please wait for me, and don’t cry. Please smile.